a. | 25 | queer | oklahoma
child of libraries and dusty books.
Let’s say it all together now….”libraries provide more than just access to books!” I am so tired of seeing a community space reduced to a place to leave books. Amazon can’t replace ESOL classes, early literacy story times, access to public computers and training, nor can it replace a safe space to do any of these things and more. Libraries promote the right to read whatever you want, and while collections are developed, we wouldn’t stop access to books with a publisher we didn’t agree with or remove books from a patrons account like the famous 1984 kindle story awhile back.
And who is going to provide these kindles? Or teach people how to use them? Will items in other languages be provided?
I know the author is most likely not serious, or just playing this from a privileged “I’ve never been in a place in my life where I needed a public library, and we spend money on it and things we spend money on that don’t apply to me make me mad” angle, but this whole thing pisses me off. By all means, continue to develop these programs for those who would like to use them, but don’t assume it us the right fit for everyone. Netflix hasn’t stopped my patrons from checking out tons of movies each week. And I like to think that what I’m able to provide as a librarian isn’t as replaceable as an instruction manual for a new amazon service.
but feeling super down. I suppose it’s natural. I have such a long road ahead of me for recovery. I’ve got so much love and support, but I’m fixated on the one person that can’t support me right now, because he’s healing too. Why can’t I be happy? I suppose I am. It’s just everything is emotionally tense and I’ve got tunnel vision.
Perhaps I am fixated on this because I know if I widen my scope I am going to get freaked at how sick I actually am/was. Like, I was headed towards shortening my lifespan by 20 years. Life is so short, and I feel like I haven’t done much worthy of achievement. I know of I say that out loud people are going to throw various accomplishments I’ve made at me. But, it still feels empty.
This just wasn’t in the plan. Not at all. It’s scary having to change directions, lifestyle choices, etc. I don’t feel safe anymore.
Maybe I’m just too sad for my own good tonight. Maybe I just need sleep.
"What’s your favorite album, or book?" "I really like Metamorphosis, I think it says a lot about the human condition and psyche." "Yeah I love Franz Kafka." "Oh no, I was talking about Hilary Duff’s debut album."